A girl learns...

This post is not exclusively for women, but I suppose women may identify more with it than men.. but some of the more observant men may also largely agree with some of the things...

Let me fill u in on the background: I just attended my cousin's wedding in Mumbai and till now she was the eldest unmarried girl in my family of my generation; so predictably it was she who had to answer all the pointed questions about marriage plans from our relatives.. however, now that baton has been passed on to me and I have to dodge questions like "so, ur'e next.. when do we see u settling down?" etc etc... however, this wedding also got me thinking about a lot of things about our family, about us cousins, about girls, growing up, bitching with ur girlfriends, growing into the woman u always wanted to be... so here is some reminiscing and some observing and some contemplating...

A girl learns...

- To sit without fidgeting with her hair... she has to resist the urge to touch her hair when she has a 2 tonne dupatta pinned precariously on it and any move may mean her head will snap back and her neck will break! :-))

- To sit quietly without having anyone to talk to, and still look like she's not bored. Yup, when u are surrounded by relatives whose span of conversation stretches to 'how is ur job going?' and 'so, u're next', then u have to learn to sit and amuse urself alone, maybe figure out where ur life is going (or maybe not) and wonder how long before u'll be crucified too...

- To smile graciously even when she cant stand the other person... (i dont need to elaborate on this one i think)

- To entertain... my cousin (the bride's sister) who was such a tom-boy when she was a kid, actually arranged the whole wedding and took care of the guests, smiled and entertained with inane conversation and made everyone's stay as comfortable as possible... a long way since the time she'd be able to speak only rude insulting things and piss off most people with her forthrightness!

- To appreciate the true value of make-up... which uptil now consisted of only kajal (sometimes not even that) but when u start looking at urself in the mirror and when u start looking at ur cousins, peer pressure and maybe what u see in the mirror makes u think "ok next time I will take care of my appearance and look better with just that little bit extra... " Yeah yeah, those of you who know me will exclaim 'wow, u sound like such a girl!!" but, i think i am ok with that! :-))

- To praise her husband, even when its not necessary or earned... oh believe u me, there are many wives who get away with a hell of a lot with just a few words of appreciation.. there is nothing like a bloated male ego to get u what u really want!

- To smile her way into a bargaining position... now, i am not at all in favour of using this tactic in professional life, but in personal life, this weapon goes a long, long way.. from getting better deals on mundane things like taxi fare, to getting a helping hand with ur luggage (when ur'e just being lazy and not because u cant be self-reliant), to getting tea served at ur office desk! Smile ur way through girl!

- To appreciate her mother's taste and not recoil everytime she picks out something that she likes and thinks her daughter can wear... u suddenly one day realise that for some ocassions, its best to atleast consider the judgement of ur (wiser) mom and if u let go sometimes, the results could be spectacular... or they couldnt be, but atleast you made her day! :-))

- To drink beer/wine in front of all the conservative relatives (see them eye her appraisingly) so they can tell spicy stories about her to everyone! Hehehhee.. oops, this could backfire like anything, but who cares..

- To resist the temptation of flirting once she has tied the knot! Ask my now ‘happily wedded’ cousin about this one! :-)

Actually, I think there is a lot more that a girl learns when she realises that she and her 'playmates' have finally grown up...