Thursday, July 27, 2006

No one..

Have you ever felt so lonely in this world, surrounded by several people, yet no one who you can actually talk to.. no one who will understand your despair, your dreams, your disappointments.. no one you can confide in without being judged.. and even your closest friends are not enough.. they cannot see what you can see, and even if they can, there is nothing they can do about it to make you feel better... so alone, like an island... taking the hits of the waves alone, struggling through the toughest moments of life alone... not a soul who can say 'yes, i know what you mean' without judging you for it... no one who is willing to listen...

And you want to escape reality.. perhaps that's why I am writing this post today.. wanting to find refuge in confiding in people who have no 'obligation' to care, from whom you have no expectations, but who probably will (or not)..

Its raining.. maybe a walk/drive in the rain will take me out of this mood I've gotten into today... or not.

No, I don't need help.. I need a friend.. a shoulder to cry on..

rone de aaj humein, yeh aankhen sujane de
baahon mein lene de aur khud ko bheeg jaane de
hain jo seene mein qaid dariya woh chhoot jaayega
hain itna dard ke tera daaman bheeg jaayega
- Mere haath mein, Fanaa, 2006

16 comments:

Prasoon said...

count me in.. :) i fit your second para perfectly !

know what - you stole my thoughts of 'today' though i have been feeling the same for years now. all i do is have a nice lil cadbusys' that meakes me forget everything !! try something like this - you might feel better !!

S said...

we are all alone in this battle of life ..friends, family .. can listen to u , comfort u , lend u a shoulder to cry but then after tht , u r back on ur own ...so i guess the trick lies in making oneself so strong that the need to cry on someone's shoulder does not arise or even if it does , the lack of it does not give u another reason to cry .

Still Searching said...

prasoon..
in this day and age of counting calories, i've stopped seeking solace in chocolate! :-) too bad actually.. there is nothing better than letting urself go and enjoying delicious chocolate!

shilpi..
i agree, and we all learn to deal with it alone.. but i realised there is nothing as good as a kind word from your family, a hug from your mother and a dinner with good friends to uplift your mood!

S said...

ya u can say this is what gives u the strength to take life head on!!

BD said...

Well...ditch Fanaa.

Mein hoon na :)

the vestige said...

where is the beer snap

Y? said...

yes! I know what you mean.
But suddenly life hands you these surprise moments when you feel like wow did I ever feel that low once..bad times pass..
but yeah still bad time are bad times:(

Still Searching said...

shilpi...
yes, u have to look at the good things with u and try and deal with the bad things as best that u can.. life goes on anyways

equilibrium...
Hehehehe.. thanks!

the vestige...
thanks for treating us to dinner.. beer snap is def on its way, soon enough.. am just wondering how controversial it may get!

y?..
yes, life does have a way of handing u the good and bad packages by surprise! ces't la vie!

Anonymous said...

I feel like this a lot. ; - )

but then i have also learned to be happy in my own company which has made me strong.

so don't need others' support.

Cheers, Rohit

aRbit said...

I know what you're talking about...on a cynical day, I sit and mope thinking
"I don't need no arms around me.
And I don't need no drugs to calm me.
I have seen the writing on the wall.
Don't think I'll need anything at all." - (Thanks to Pink Floyd and a friend of mine who introduced me to them!)
On "mature" days, I sit down and give myself a good talking-to and try and see that things aren't so bad after all (it becomes easier if you do this part with a sugar filled macademia nut cookie :D)

zoxcleb said...

hey sorry... with a broken net connection i havent lived up to my promise completely...

as for ur first sentence in the post... i feel that way all the time... but thats how it is i reason... its a one man/woman army fighting the rest of the 6 billion.. and a few other uncontrollable factors...

me here if u still feel like venting!

pentium77 said...

Hmm...I feel exactly like this today. Mebbe becoz it's a Monday and add to that it seems to be a slow day @ work.
I also feel like nothing excites me anymore. Not fame, not money, not food, not friends (with whom you end up having the same old conversation everytime) anyway...
I just take solace in books and my own little plans for life ...

Still Searching said...

@rohit
yes, that is def a solution.. to enjoy one's own company is a thing we must all learn.. many people become very distraught when alone, but thats not how it should be..

@arbit
i think music can really help uplift a person's mood.. cliched but i really believe in the power of music!
p.s. how are u not getting fat with all the cookie eating?!!

@zoxcleb
hehehe, thanks for the support! yes, we are alone in this world and like i said, we have to live with this truth.. the show must go on!

@pentium77
there are many times when i feel the same way.. want to curl up with my book and cup of tea, shutting out the world because nothing seems to hold much meaning.. but i attribute this to my moody nature and not really lifes ups and downs!

zoxcleb said...

queen's songs always find use! :-)
try them...

i'll have another one said...

wow didnt realise so many of us feel this way...which often leaves us wanting to forget...(guess that explains the age old popularity of alcohol, chocholates and relationships in which case, i recommend chocholate liquer with friends as the shortcut route)...though i look at it this way-if so many people "with no obligations to care" are writing in to tell you they feel the same way and are there in some way, you can be damn sure that there are tonnes of friends for you in the non blog world who feel the same way and reach out..

tomorrow's another day

Still Searching said...

Hmmm.. yes that's true.. that I am not alone in feeling this way, and that itself is a consolation I suppose.. and if there are so many people whom I don't know and don't know me but who can identify with this state of being, then that's a big support in itself! It's nice to see so many people 'care' and share their thoughts :-)