I'd like to

Fall in love...

Its been very long. a few years maybe. since I felt that way... this morning I've been in a great mood, been humming a nice song, been smiling more than usual, been more confident that I can handle life, been more relaxed and trying not to let some things happening in my life unfaze me, eager to meet the next turn in my life, eager to meet someone to share the joy with!

I'm crazy... by evening the cynic in me will let me know that I was just dreaming this morning, and bring me back to reality, but for the moment, I'd like to fall in love.. I'd like to have a smile on my face thinking about something 'he' said (not necessarily flattery or praise of me, I am not a fool - anymore)... I'd like for us to watch a DVD at home, sitting with our arms around each other, sharing a laugh or two, playing with my hair, cribbing about how silly girls are when they get emotional in a movie and still wiping my tears when I cry at the end (which I inevitably will, no matter which movie it is!)... I'd like to take a walk, not hand in hand, but still very much together..

And the funny thing is that almost never do you get these thngs in a real relationship!! So that's why I dont want one! Its just a feeling thats in your head, the romance, the love etc etc.. when a real human being enters the picture, things are not so rosy.. which is why I'd rather be single.. but still be in love.. (how does that make sense?!!)

The thing about saying 'I'd like to' have something is that u don't need it, u just would like to have it.. if its not there, nothing is missing.. but if it is there, then its just another happy aspect to your life.. what is nice about 'growing up' (and getting rid of the idea of 'puppy love', gifts and valentines) is that you don't need someone to complete you, u're already content and u'd like to share the joy with someone, anyone, who understands why u're smiling... spread the joy u feel inside for being alive, for being blessed with so many things, for being who you are and having accepted yourself like that, for having lost weight and looking good.. hehehe.. so many reasons to smile every day, and u'd like to have someone who would 'listen to that smile' because it says so many things!!

By the time I've published this post, I'd have already gotten over my day dream, for sure.. a momentary lapse in control and u're thinking about doing ur own version of one of those romantic ads u see on tv, but I'll let myself be foolish for just one moment... imagine the walking-on-air feeling, the radiant smile and some handsome hunk too good to be true!! :-))

Hehehe... funnily enough, I'm just so happy today (for no particular reason, let me remind you) that I'd let myself think I'm Ms. Universe today, about to meet the man of my dreams!!!

(God forbid a guy really 'enters the scene' and ruins the perfect picture!! Hehehee..)