Thursday, July 19, 2007

When I grow up...

I think I’ve mentioned before that I have a family here in the US whom I’ve been staying with these past couple of months… I have 2 cousins here, and yesterday I was having this “family bonding session” with the kids when we started talking about what they wanted to do when they grow up… Given that I am already “grown up” I wasn’t allowed to add my own dreams to the conversation, so I sat there and listened to them, all starry-eyed and full of ideas as they were, and sat back and thought about what it was like when you still had many options that you could choose from! And decided that if the kids won't listen to my dreams, you will! :))

I think my very first memories were of wanting to become a police officer! I think my parents were discussing Kiran Bedi one evening… I was so taken up by the whole idea of fighting for justice against the wrong-doers and the woman power thing that I was all in favour of becoming one hell of a dynamic police officer, fighting my way through corruption and crime and helping turn around the world, or atleast the country, or atleast my state… hehehehe, ofcourse then I grew up and realized what a distant dream this was.. and I know my parents breathed a sigh of relief…

Then later, I wanted to give my life to fighting for the environment such as the likes of Medha Patkar, working for the cause of saving this earth! My school was responsible for putting this idea into my head, no one else. They encouraged us to stop using plastic bags, taught us about recycling and biodegradable versus non-biodegradable waste, showed us how to make compost pits (many a Sunday afternoons were spent hauling wheelbarrows full of cow dung from the dairy farm near our campus and food waste from the dining hall!!) and made us aware of the possible repercussions of having MNCs take over all our indigenous industries. Oh yeah, that’s my school. And that’s way back in the 90s, when it wasn’t a “fad” to do this! And no it wasn’t brainwashing either, they didn’t force us to boycott Pepsi and Coke - we just did so, you know, being young and all adrenalin-charged like! (P.S: No we weren’t involved in the vandalizing of KFC in Bangalore, in case you were wondering)… Anyways, I still remember one time I ordered Thums Up at a restaurant while I gave my family a lecture about how Coke/Pepsi should be thrown out of the country, when my Dad politely pointed out to me that Thums Up was a Coke company product, smugly smiling as he turned the bottle so I could see that indeed it was! In time of course I realized there’s no money in fighting for the environment, so I left it at that. However, to do this dream justice, I still to this day avoid using plastic bags, don’t use the A/C so I don’t add to the ozone layer depletion directly, and always recycle whatever I can.

And the last and possibly the most passionate dream I had, and one I still think of pursuing sometime in my life, was of becoming a dancer… a full-fledged dancer in a troupe or individually, doing stages shows, going around the world performing, creating and then basking in the audience applause… dancing till it hurts, dancing till it becomes enough to live on, dancing till I reach nirvana (reference to the Sufi style of meditation)… And its this one that I can’t let go of, its this one that I truly regret not having pursued, its this one dream that nags at me every time I meet someone who has had the guts to follow their heart and be true to themselves…


So, what did you dream of becoming when you grew up?

40 comments:

Nice New Guy said...

I'm not going to write what all I wanted to be - your comments page is spared!

But dancing. You think you can pursue that in your spare time (do you get 'spare' time?) Join dance groups? Slowly move to stage shows (There's nothing like your new 'hot' manager sitting in a hall staring unblinking at you dancing on the stage.) If you don't start now, all that will remain is this blog post, and a lady frustrated with a dream nagging on her every time.

Then there's the possibility of that lady who responds to "Whoa! I loved your stage show!" with "Always wanted to do that. Got up one day and put the first foot forward."

Someone wrote on my blog recently: "Life is full of possibilities we never had the chance to explore...". So true. :)

Ganju said...

i think you just called me a grown up. and i resent that. i still don't know what i'm going to be when i grow up.

doesn't matter where i'm headed, i'm just enjoying the ride :)

sinusoidally said...

I wanted to be a pilot for the longest time ever.

APOO said...

Bus driver. I wanted to be a bus driver. Still do. I jes keep flunking the drivers test.

satyajit said...

earliest was scientist, then cricketer..i dont regret it, but given another chance i would want to be a professional sportsman..but all this will be more than recompensed, if i can just write for a living

StandbyMind said...

Great..u wannen to be Kiran bedi ..:)
and the medhna patkar...Kya baat hain!
and what about dancing..whats wron now..y dont u pursue it..its neva neva late pal...
I hope u do..

about me..
I wannen to be a hacker first..badly..but then gat into this Btech thihng..and changed my mind ;)
lol
Now I want to be a Dj...
See I am old for that too..But I think I will do it..and send u passes to the club I ll play in:)

Candid Confessions said...

Wow! From a police officer to an environmentalist to a dancer! Thats a broad spectra!! :)

Zee said...

u actually live without the AC?????????? oh man......that is being damn passionate about the environment!!! are u really serious????????? i can't get over it!!!

my dream's been constant i think....and not acheived as of now...to become a housewife...or a food taster somewhere...

Still searching said...

`nice new guy
your comment oddly really touched me... u're right, that if i dont start now, i'll just be writing about it and getting frustrated.. i have been taking up dance lessons through out my life, but never broke away from a regular job to pursue it full time, which is what i really want to do deep down inside... hmmm...

`ganju
hehehe.. am sorry! i didnt mean to be presumptious about it! :)) i like that, that u're enjoying the journey... nice...

`sinusoidally
why didn't you be one?

`apoo
hehehe.. bus driver? haha, very interesting! :))

`satyajit
hope your dream comes true, and you can write for a living.. be sure to send us details of the what u write! and what sport did u want to play?

`standbymind
too late to take the risk of getting out of a regular job and doing dancing full time.. but i'm seriously thnking of it... hacker?! wow, thats some dream! :) and I thought BTechs would be better equipped to become hackers after all! btw, if u do become DJ pls def do send me passes, i'd love to come over and dance the night out!

`cc
hehe, yeah wild dreams.. what about you?

`zee
yup, no A/C in the house.. i do ofcourse use it in my car, but thats becoz i want to survive to fulfill my other dream, of becoming a dancer! food taster one i did get from one of ur earlier posts, but housewife?!! well, u're prob on your way to that dream !

Cool said...

Ruchi, wake up!!!

Princess Banter said...

Dreams and ambitions are indeed precious, aren't they? I've always wanted to become a writer and make a living out of it -- but the "Asian" in me is overflowing with practicality, cowardice and weakness. I've settled for it being a hobby for now... but I'm still hoping one day, it will come true. If only...

IR said...

imagine a police officer with a blog description that goes

"Self-destructive, Sentimental and Sensible" :)

when i was a kid i wanted to be the PM of the country, for some reason everbody thought it was funny

nutty said...

Awesome! I can't believe you want to be a professional dancer! I've always wanted to be a dancer myself .. so much so in fact that my parent actually considered sending me to a nrityagram .. alas! The "Asian weakness practicality and cowardice" (did I get it right?) took over ..

After that I wanted to be an architect and a jewelery designer :)I still hope to have my line of jewelery some day .. when I'm rich enough to sustain the pieces no one buys :D

Nice New Guy said...

... when I grow up, I want to be someone who does not queue up for Harry Potter's (or whatever is the Fantasy craze at that point - there ain't any more Potters coming out now) new book.

(Oops) I did it again.

S said...

WOW ...me too wanted to be Kiran Bedi !! But the inspiration was not the woman power thing ..it was the TIHAR JAIL ....yes yes , actually i dreamt of handling the 'qaidiis' of tihar ...hey but this dream was very short lived :-))
Next i wanted to be a smart savvy corporate woman ..but the very first job shattered that dream too :-((
And this is a contentious one ..my parents tell me that when i was a very young kid , i wanted to be MOTHER TERESA ..NO , i don't believe them !!
The latest in the list and the most mature dream that i have had for quite some time now..and still very far from realisation ..is to become a calm and composed person ...yes , that is actually MY DREAM ( well ofcrs it includes my college days' dream of becoming a business journalist ..haha !! ))

Cuckoo said...

You do dance well, into many a heart. Go on, take up a second job dancing.

At one level we dream about many a thing, but if the passion in the dream is missing, I personally think it is better relegated to an interest and continue in a job that provides for daaru in stomach and money for vacations. But if you are indeed passionate about something, it is worth giving up close to everythign to pursue it.

Nithya N said...

dreams and ambitions vary with time so i'll mention only the first of my dreams. i wanted to be a terrorist. no,not the alqueda types but i was inspired by the freedom struggle stories i was exposed to as a kid. and illegality is always fascinating!
But then there was a time when i wanted to be in the indian army.

And i have to mention this one i still nourish in the corner of my heart- to become a journalist; to run a sucessfull firm, to rule this country eventually.

nasia said...

I wanted to becum an actress.. :-(
i still do.. nagging dream

Still searching said...

`cool
wake up and do what?! dance?!

`princess banter
yeah, they're precious, but usually lost.. so true about the "asian" in us.. no risk-taking ability! and btw, u can pursue your writer dream, since u write well..

`ir
i know!! i can safely say that scorpios aren't cut out to be police officers!

`nutty
hey!! i nearly ran away from school when we had gone to Nityagram on a school excursion! I was like, just leave me here, let me be here forever! :)) Nice to know someone else also wanted to do that! you got the asian thng right, risk-averse people that we are! Jewelry design sounds exciting! :))

`nice new guy
hehehe.. how old are u again?!

`s
my first job also shattered my dreams of smart savvy corporate woman! :)) hehehe.. mother teresa?! unbelievable! :) and i think u're well on your way of achieving calm and composed woman dream, atleast other than your husband! hehehe

`cuckoo
yes, i agree... that unless u're really passionate, its better to stick with a regular job... i am really passionate, but there's too much struggle in following it...

`nithya
terrorist?! omg! but i think it sounds like ur'e talking about the naxalites.. yeah, their stories can inspire u in one way.. and i guess its never too late to become a journalist!

Still searching said...

`nasia
that falls into my category of "too much struggle" career option, just like becoming a professional dancer! but hope u can pursue it some day...

Fuzzy, the Ducky said...

Thanks for your comment Ruchi! I love the frankness of your blog.

"I realized there’s no money in fighting for the environment, so I left it at that"

I think I need to say something about the enviornment here, but then you touched on dancing and thats got me all excited.

Have you studied any dancing anywhere, any form? I am as crazy as you are about it, like I said, just joined Salsa and now I'm learning something called Merengue!

Nice New Guy said...

still-searching:

Not old enough to understand rhetorical questions. ;)

DreamCatcher said...

wah! kya baat hai..well i was jst surprised who stumbled on my blog ..n i reach here to ur place..
n this post..when i almost repeating what i have been saying to myself for long...

dance even being a guy which i want to pursue..one is dance and other is playing guitar..
n now m on my way ..have promised myself ..

everyone here i see have already said what shd b said..lemme add jst this
ALL THE BEST..
nice blog u have..:)

Shanks said...

i wanted to be n army officer, superstar, multi billionaire( this was the time when i red H.Robbins)
A doctor ( which I am), a music producer and a dj...

very nice post keep it up...

mathew said...

nice one..but seriously if u love dancing go for it...

When I was a kid I wanted to be the Milkman..I loved to ring the cycle bell and loved the attention he grabbed when he comes to neighbourhood!!

Still searching said...

`fuzzy duck
do we know each other btw?! i mean, u used my name and so am wondering! forgive me if u're someone i'm supposed to know coz i have been trying to guess from ur blog but cant! or are u very clever and got my name from someone else's comment?! :))

good to see someone else as crazy as i am about dancing.. i've learnt lots and lots of dance forms, the latest one being salsa (last yr), merengue (one evening only though, but its a lot like salsa!), jazz, kalari, chhau, odissi, western folk dance, bharatnatyam etc etc.. as u can see, jack of all trades, master of none :)

`nice new guy
lucky you :)

`dreamcatcher
thanks :) playing guitar is a very awesome and very handy hobby :) btw, surprisingly u seem to have a lot in common with fuzzy the ducky!

`shanks
aaah, the chance to become rich is one dream i think none of us leave till our dying day! and u and standbymind have something in common, the dj dream! well, good for u atleast one of ur dreams has come true, of being a doctor.

`mathew
milkman?! haha, nice one! hey, u think the moustache is inspired from the milkman?! i mean, every milkman, atleast in movies, has a nice big moustache like ur pic! :)) hehee, just kidding..

zoxcleb said...

first.. sorry for the deletion....

now...
wow... when i grow up... i remember thinking that... sometimes i still do... but i know.. i'll never grow up :-)

i like the way u thought abt things, its lovely how such innocent ideas can influence the thoughts of children. if only their innocence stayed on we'd have such a lovely planet to live on!

(sorry, not quite in the vein of what u were getting at.. but just felt i had to say it)

Bullshee said...

An uncle and aunty we met in a train asked us that question once.... Little me and Little me-brother turned to our parents and asked them "What CAN we be when we grow up?" After several minutes of nudging each other, my dad smiled dazzlingly and said, "Uhhh....you can become an engineer....or....er...a doctor".

I piped up: I wanna be an engineer!!(my dad said it first, and i guessed it would be more important)

My bro who hated doing anything I did(in true sibling rivalry methodology) screamed:Then I'm going to become a doctor....

12 years later, I have a B.Tech in Civil Engg, my bro's in his third year at Med School(none the happier)

Stupid ignorant parents.....grrrr.....

:D :D :D :D

StandbyMind said...

The mission accomplished...U felt the smell of KOOL CAFE..yes!!!!!!!!
y should I suffer alone:o

Still searching said...

`zoxcleb
hehehe.. i wasn't exactly a child when I thought of becoming an environmentalist... I guess thats why the practical side of me took over.. incidentally, I have a lot of classmates from my school who did follow their hearts and dreams, and its meeting soem of them which is making me thinking about this again! So I guess losing ur innocence is a matter of choice?!

`bullshee
hehehe.. interesting that a conversation on the train one mundane day influenced ur lives so much! hehehe.. well i think its a dream come true! :))

`standbymind
i hate u for doing this! hehehee.. :)) just kidding

zoxcleb said...

losing ur innocence is indeed a matter of choice... but then is becoming practical called losing ur innocence? or just being hardened by what other "grown ups" have made of this world.

The Dude said...

hey..
well, first thing i feel bears mentioning is that you say that now youre older and things are expected and all that, but yknow, ive come to the realisation that the biggest loss in human nature is the idealism and love for life of childhood...
the part of you that wanted to be a cop, or save the planet.. these are things that should not be lost, but they are... these are ideals that we should be proud to hold and hang those that would scoff at them... what right have they to make such a judgement? i include many parents in that btw...

since you ask, the first thing i can remember wanting to be was a truck driver.. i always loved the idea (even at age 7 or 8) of just being me and the open road... as i got older i wanted to be an astronaut (and so you know, these are things i still bear in mind if someday they become possible!)..
what i am today is just another cog in the machine, struggling to be a writer, to make my passion, the thing that makes me feel alive, a reality..

never give up on your dreams.. in these times its all we have..
cheers..

manish said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
manish said...

I thought you also had this dream of being a singer one day ?? Or is it that it was just a passing thought :))(with reference to one of your previous posts)

Still searching said...

`zoxcleb
yeah, thats right i guess... that we mould ourselves according to what is expected of us, or what we expect for ourselves..

`dude
thats true, that we should not let go of the child-like nature of ours.. and this includes being truthful to yourself and what you want, and going after it in any manner possible! (Like kids use crying as a method to get what they want!) Truck driver?! When when you put it like that, open roads sound very welcoming and I feel like being one too! hehehhe... there's apoo (commented above) who shares your dream - he wanted to be a bus driver! :))

`manish
i wanted to sing, but i was discouraged! and as a principle, i don't dream of things that i don't think i'll be good at! :)) what were your dreams? u didn't share!

Pravin said...

I wanted to grow up to be an astronaut, an explorer, a veterinary doctor. I ended up studying engineering. I'm not sure what I'm going to end up as.

Still searching said...

`pravin
u're lucky u seem to still have time to decide! :)

Mayth!! said...

*sigh* you dont always ending up doing what you want to. But its just wanting to do something special and out-of-the-ordinary that keeps it exciting. Ditto for me, but its a bit of dance and music, both :)

Adarsh said...

the first time I was asked about 'my aim in life' was back in 1992 I guess, and my answer was 'To be a Scientist'.

Now that I think of, all my growing years(specially late 90s) I just wanted to be an engineer. In that way, I have fulfilled my childhood ambition.

The out-of the-norm ambitions/dreams developed in College like being a movie director, or a character actor, or a choreographer, to be a musician, to be called a 'Doctor' (which I hope to be true post 2012).

Well, the dreams which I tried for, did come true (touchwood). I didn't have the guts/cpapability to go after the others.

Chaitali said...

I had read this post before but didn't leave a comment then. I really hope you od follow your dream...I think I know you at least to a certain extent and know that when you do follow your heart, you will be happy. :)